3/24/2020. Must be C-19 Day #8. Remember the pretty little expressions: April showers…. The merry month of May… Swing into spring…. Not feelin’ it. Well perhaps just a little. The first hour or so of the day goes up and down and up and down. I awake feeling smothered; get up and note body feels fine (something people ‘of a certain age’ check!), spirits lift; first hot milky coffee AND news that China may be easing back toward ‘normal’ AND to top it all off a cheerful FB post from a smiling colleague AND the fact there are so many things I love to do (writing, reading, photographing, enjoying friends via media) ahead of me today—should I choose to take advantage of them.
But NOW, Pollyanna has left the building and I remember we have an incompetent narcissist leading the country in possession of the most bombs—that would be my country, this country and all of a sudden that being-smothered feeling returns. AND I remember my son’s best friend has unexpectedly died (not from C-19) AND that my brother/sister-in-law are back in Minnesota and I miss them AND my work is closed and may or may not ever reopen AND that I’m effing old. Stop it Marjorie. You are being negative, maudlin, defeatist…and you are not usually all of those things at once.